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Saturday, February 18, 2006

 

Our Newest Op Ed

It's Just Another Day in Paradise
- By Greg Stewart


Okay, I am sitting here working on the computer, doing homework, listening to music, emailing, and reading the textbook from my astronomy class, yes--I am a multi-tasker, when I realize that it was three in the morning and I had not slept for at least for twenty-four hours. So, this is not an earth shattering discovery, or discovery the universe is 14 billion years old, or that Kenny keeps getting killed on South Park, or that the sky is blue, or water is wet, but it has been a trend lately, reflecting my insomnia and that every time put my head to pillow the brain will not shut off. So I have a few questions, is it possible to grow brain cells after your dead? Why did Johnny Cash always wear black? Where did General O'Neill disappear to on SG-1? And, who is the idiot who thought up the concept of work, anyway?

Oh, I don't mind working, its part of my addictive personality. I am here to confess, I am a workaholic. The only time, I fear, I will relax is when I die, but I pray, (Yes, agnostics pray! were just not sure which religious entity will receive the message--so we pray to them all; like sending a universal email, if you will allow). Anyway, I pray that if I go, it is in the arms of fiery dynamo, with long legs wrapped around me, and of starry emerald eyes encompassing my soul and passion--at that moment of embarkation.

However, the question remains when that time comes: which voice will I hear, male or female, or will the universe be a cruel mother and reveal no voice at all? My hope is that it will be female. Why? Because, it's the perfect payback, and the fact that Alanis Morrisett is the actual voice of God (reference Dogma) and it will teach certain fundamentalists a lesson. Also, the hope is that she will grant my wish of a certain number of concubines (I just want 36 not 40) so that I know all the emotions of life, love, lust, empathy, fear, joy, passion, compassion, and much more. .........
Click HERE To Read On
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